Living The Pozitive LIfe

There are plenty of good reasons to utter the words “lets just be friends” after a first date. Perhaps there was no chemistry or a lack of shared interests, or maybe he was just a little bit of a dick. Regardless of what your reasoning to either call or not call him again, his HIV status shouldn't be a factor. HIV isn't one of the variables that determine whether you and your partner are an emotional and physical match. It is merely a measure of logistics and science. If all of the other elements of a relationship seem to be clicking – sexual attraction, similar tastes, and a mutual like for each other’s weirdness – both of you would be a fool to let mismatched statuses get in the way. However, there are a few things you should be know when starting a relationship with an HIV-positive guy.  Pay attention, and you two may live happily ever after – or at least not break up over HIV. 1. If you have a question, don’t be afraid to ask. You may be worried that a questi...

When I was first knew I had HIV, I have no idea what to do. I had no one to turn to. I did not know anyone else. I went on Twitter. I made some friends and gotten some kind of support system I was looking for, but it wasn't quite adequate. Twitter pozzies are all over the world. I needed people in case anything happened, which looking back, there were times I needed help urgently like going to the hospital to getting emergency pills from friends. Soon, it will come to three years. I've built up a network of people whom I can rely on in case I needed help, from physicians and pharmacists, friends and pozzies. They are like a gem. So, to new pozzies and newly diagnosed, if you do not know where to turn or needed someone to talk to, I am all ears. You can email or tweet me. If you are looking for something to say to someone who has HIV, my advice is, don't say anything. Saying the wrong things just make things worse than it already is, unless you are a doctor speci...

Kudos and thank you, Singapore! Since 1 April 2015, Singapore has quietly lifted its travel ban on HIV+ people, no announcement were made then. The travel ban has been in place since the 1980s back at a time when HIV was not understood. Techonology in medication has improved vastly and HIV+ people on medication posses little or significantly reduced risk to others. Only last week, the media has reported that the Government of Singapore has lifted the ban. So now, foreigners visiting Singapore need not worry of being deported or denied entry. Ref: http://www.straitstimes.com/singapore/entry-ban-eased-for-foreigners-with-hiv

Do you know much how stress and agony the hospital put me through for the last one year? I did write about my test being rejected in November because it was within the 6 months timeframe of an earlier test. In July 2014, my viral load was 38.. I assume sometime after that, it would have already reached undetectable levels but I couldn't confirm it in November. When the viral load test was repeated last month - July 2015, it came back reading NOT DETECTABLE!! >> ok I know I am over the moon now. I mean, it's like, finally! It took me a little longer to get to undetectable level because when I started my medication, my CD4 was double digit only and I was admitted to hospital, with a viral load to begin with of over 244,000 copies. Thankfully it's well suppressed now, but my latest CD4 results were a little affected as well. I am not sure what caused it, don't remember being unwell during the blood test, but regardless, the more accurate reading of U...

My latest blood count: CD4: 464 taken 24 March (up from 303 taken on 20 Nov) CD4%: 16.4% up from 16% However, the VL reading taken on 20 Nov is not ready yet, hence it's still at 38 at the last test in July 2014. I also overloaded on my HDL cholesterol and my weigh has been steadily increasing, both of which are a result of better appetite as my CD4 picks up. I hope to receive the latest VL when I go collect my medication next month. It should be out. Took too long.

I walked out of the hospital lab with a brown envelope sealed and marked "Private & Confidential". March 5, 2012. As I sat down at one corner in the hospital, I carefully opened the envelope, hands tembling, and pulled out some pieces of A4 papers. Not much text. It was March 5, 2012. As I read the papers, my world crashed down on me. I was speechless. I was dumbfounded. I was mindfucked. I couldn't talk. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. That day was March 5, 2012. I couldn't believe my eyes. I read and re-read time and again the copies. Not only were they identical - they only have one word: REACTIVE. REACTIVE REACTIVE REACTIVE Nothing else. The clock stopped on that day - March 5, 2012. I spent the next 2 weeks crying in isolation. Not knowing what to do. Not knowing what my future holds. Not knowing what has become of me. Not knowing how to continue on living. I was suicidal. I thought of ending my own life. I even thought abo...

This morning was my routine bi-annual checkup, I only see my doctor twice a year now if I'm all well. I'm super anxious today apart from being quite happy and positive, no pun intended, because I'm waiting to hear how my viral load is after 15 months on med. In July, here's the numbers so far: CD4: 303 CD4%: 14.4 VL: 38 But as I was feeling under the weather the day my blood was taken, my doctor ordered another test in Nov. Here's Nov: CD4: 303 (no change) CD4%: 16 (point something I can't recall) VL: results unavailable yet I am quite positive that in November my VL could have been suppressed to Undetectable level. Signs and number are looking really good for me and I can't wait to find out what my VL reading was when my blood was taken in Nov. Sadly, 2 tubes of blood were spoilt as they can't test for my blood sugar and cholesterol levels.  But that's the least of my worries because I am so close to Undetectable in July and I am really, really hope...